sometimes people ask me how i write these poems
how do i find the words
always the answer is practice
every time i tried to explain myself
and was scolded for making excuses
every time i spoke to myself in the shower
reciting and revising for next time
every time i held back tears, held back breath
as conversing became combating
every time i was asked to restrain myself
lest i become angry, and disruptive
every time i tried to reach the honest parts of the people that i love most
and found only plastic laughter,
a recycled joke
i've been writing these poems for a long time
~
i desperately need understanding"
- R.A.P. Ferreira
i often get a single line stuck in my head - usually based on rhythm, sometimes content - this one was on my mind while i was writing